Teach them the difference....

Between right and wrong. That is our main job/goal as a parent. To teach your children the value of what is right and what is wrong. Though life everyone does things that are wrong. It does not mean that the parents did not teach it to them though... Although when they do wrong, especially when they do very wrong.... The parents are the ones that take the blame, blame themselves, and wonder what they did wrong, or how they could have done better.

Tonight I am in that situation. I feel like a fuck up, failure of a mother. Apparently I have not taught well enough, the value of a dollar, of being honest, and of owning up to a mistake when you make one... We all make mistakes and I know that. It just totally sucks when you make them, or when your children make them. You want to go in and just erase it and you cannot.

Today life really just plain sucks. One day I will look back at this and it not seem like as big of a deal as it is now... probably when they do something much, much worse (lol, I think). I only hope that the younger three can just learn from the oldests mistakes, and not make the same ones... I can only hope.

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Its not always 50/50

Sometimes one person has to hold up more weight than the other does. Lately I feel as though I am that person holding the extra weight. Lately I have been wishing I was not that person. I feel like I am being spread a bit too thin... I also feel like no matter how many times I try to explain myself, it does not matter. So I will just keep waiting, and hopefully eventually someone will come and take a few books off of my stack. Take a load off. Help me out. Chip in. You get it? I am sure you do. Now if only other people did as well. God doesnt give you more than you can handle. I wonder sometimes if He thinks the load he's giving me is being more evenly distributed than it is... Maybe he can review my case :)

8 years at the same job!

I will say this about my work. No matter what is said, word gets around. Words also get twisted and changed, and rumors fly like well I don't know kites? I think co-workers are like a second family, not like to the point where you want to invite them over for Thanksgiving dinner... More like your around them enough that you are more than likely to have seen a bad side of them, and learned some annoyances. Chances are they were grumpy or depressed or pissed at some point and you have seen them at their worst. I think that makes it easier to get under each others skin and become annoyed. You get annoyed, you get over it, you move on. Your still co workers and you still get through. Like family, there are spats, you get over it move on and after it all your still family. So do I always love my co workers or getting up early, or when someone is rude to me, or when I don't make any money... OF COURSE NOT. I have good days and I have bad days. Today it was raining, I would have ...

Done Growing

Well soon enough it will be the start of a new school year. Sooner for my younger two, than for my older two. So today we went to get a few things that will be needed. Some shoes, socks and backpacks. Mommy needed a new pair of shoes too, I wear mine out pretty quickly being on my feet as a waitress. So my son is about the pickiest shoe person out there. Nothing fits. We have to try on like every.single.shoe. in his size before he can choose. Its irritating and stressful. Hannah was pretty easy although she did not take the cheaper "on sale" pair I liked best. Either way she was quick and painless. So then mom's turn. I put on a pair of 6.5 I wear those or 7's depending on the shoe. I wanted to try those new shoes with the curved bottom. Anyway... I get the 6.5 on and Hannah feels for my toes. "Oh you better get a size bigger" She says. "Those wont last the whole school year!" I told her I did not have to worry about outgrowing my shoes. My ...

The oddly normal life of Clorie

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