Skip to main content

Posts

would you still love me?

If you knew I had bad days If you knew I ate cereal in the tub while I cried? If you heard me sing when I thought no one was listening?  If you saw me dancing when I thought no one was looking?   If you heard the things I tell myself?  Would you love me anyway? 
Recent posts

When shit hits the fan

Single life. Well not so much single but divirced... It's been a change. I go out more I'm finding who I am. I am realizing I like me more than I thought I did. I've met someone, I know already? It wasn't in my plans to get involved in anything serious. I joined an online dating site and I got some hits (lots of hits) it's a woman's world in there! Anyway I went in a few dates and a few second dates. One second date was terrible, one was okay and one was.... NSFWOK well just say. My plan was to just date and have fun and go out and enjoy myself but I have found myself doing all that, for sure, but always with the same person... Then it happened we chose to only see each other... I mean I'd only been seeing him anyway and he I. So why not. I still go out, I'm still enjoying myself (so Much) I'm laughing and I'm motivated and I'm happy... I am so flipping happy right now. My house is falling apart and spewing shot nearly literally...

It's cute

It's cute how I used to think this barely holding it together feeling was temporary. So blogs. I can never focus on it. I want to keep a running log of this crazy life and then the craziness makes that impossible or seem so. In May, 2 months ago I got divorced. Just shy of 17 years married it was final. It was ultimately my choice, I paid for it, and I'm not at all unhappy I did it. However that does not in any way, shape, or form mean that it was EASY for me. It's still not easy. Let's just start with this evening for example. Son has friends over and wants to play his video game. However we have 1 tv and it's in the girls room. He had a monitor a while back and smashed it when he got angry btw. So he finds someone to loan him a monitor and now he needs a jump drive to update said game. It's 10pm I work at 8. I'm in bed  but I look for a jump drive. Can't find one. Sorry. Then the wifi won't work well it's out power won't come on to it

gluten free

so I posted the other day I'm going to try gluten free for my psoriasis. after a recent strep infection and round of antibiotics my psoriasis has flared up big time. coming back in places it has not been in over a year. itchy and my feet ache and my hands hurt with what should be simple tasks such as using tongs while grilling out. I told myself I'd start for really real on 8/1 but I really started and have stuck to it since about a week ago. at first I thought o was noticing improvement already, and I was excited but i have new areas today and I am itchier than ever! ugh! I've also been an emotional wreck, ugly crying at least 3x in the past week (it's also PMS week but I'm not normally such a cry baby) so I'm not sure what's going on but I'm going to stick it out for at least 30 days. I read it can take 60 so if I see ANY improvement in 30 I'll likely keep going. I am also looking into other things that will help my gut health, since antibiot

I always blog that I'm going to blog

and then never blog agian until I blog saying how I'm going to blog agian! sounds about right. life is busy. me time has not been happening. gym nope. photography nope. it's not that I dont have time, because I do. I just don't make the time. I need to. so few weeks ago. got strep throat antibiotics and BAM my skin/joint issues flared up. bad. I'm stiff sore dry and ugly. so I'm going to try to be gluten free. I love bread guys and pasta. I have to get thos crap under control though and some research suggests it helps and it certainly IS NOT going to hurt me so here goes. I started today but will count my actual start date as 9/1 b: coffee and cream, watermelon and a string cheese l: zucchini cheesey casserole hamburger patty with lettuce other veggies and mustard s: caramello [I said gluten free not healthy] d: subway spicy Italian with provolone, no bread with lots of veggies and mayo also veggie straws happy to find they are gluten free! so say 1 wen

a little alone time

I should just blog about potty stuff. I've got some bathroom stories for y'all! remember being a mom and never getting a moment to yourself EVER like even on the toilet someone is either in there, at the door,fighting outside it, or knocking "can you do this for me?"  meanwhile dad is in the lazy chair with a beer doing NOTHING but the kids don't even notice him. well mine are teens now so I often get toilet time to myself it's one luxury of raising them up. however tonight visiting my oldest I went potty and under the crack of the door was a little boogie hand and wiggly fingers " mah-mah what doing? " shes not the only one glued up my ass today but I'll save that for another day!

Time Flies

A year ago today my best friend gave birth to her second little boy. TWO years ago tomorrow my first granddaughter was born. Both seem like yesterday, but also so long ago. Two years in a row almost on the same day I got to watch the miracle of life happen... I have done it myself four times, but it never ceases to amaze me. To watch it is just amazing that our body does that. GROWS someone in side of us and then gets that someone OUT. Just amazing. Life is stressing me out right now however, I am trying to take this weekend to just tune out anything and everything that is getting to me, just have fun, go to birthday parties, eat cake and not worrry. Not worry about bills or calories or my steps (I even took my fit bit off) Just be me, just enjoy what there is in life to enjoy. My amazing friends, and my crazy family and the hot summer weather.